You're chairing a meeting, and to your dismay, things get out of hand. People interrupt each other so often that nobody can complete a thought, and some people dominate the meeting. What can you do?
ally looked around the table for anyone who wasn't trying to talk. To her relief, most weren't, but the usual suspects had their megaphones on, blasting each other at full volume. "Hold on, everyone. Hold on!" she said, raising her voice way past the comfort level. Greg — no surprise — was the last to stop.
In a more normal tone, Sally continued: "If we're going to discuss this, we'll have some order in this room. I want only one person talking at a time. Clear?"
In her attempt to bring order to chaos, Sally has just intervened, but she's unlikely to be successful unless she can enroll the entire group in the effort.
Chaotic, interrupt-driven discussions are expensive. Here are some of the costs that we can avoid with more orderly exchanges:
Delays and confusion
When we interrupt people, we sometimes prevent them from making their points in the way they planned. This introduces delays and confusion, if they ever actually make their points.
Lost contributions
Often we put the responsibility for order (or disorder) in a meeting on the shoulders of the meeting chair, but everyone in the room plays a role
Some people are especially sensitive to interruption. Some hold back, for fear of interrupting someone. Others are intimidated by the prospect of being interrupted. In an atmosphere of interruption, the group loses access to much of its creativity.
Erosion of self-esteem
When some people are interrupted, they can feel devalued. The interruption can be painful and humiliating, and it can move them to anger, even if they don't express it in the meeting. These effects can extend beyond that meeting and beyond that team.
Often we put the responsibility for order (or disorder) on the shoulders of the meeting chair, but everyone in the room plays a role. Even those who sit quietly have the choice of objecting to the disorder. Here are some tips for maintaining order.
Prevention is easier than repair
It's much easier to create an environment in which people resist the temptation to interrupt than it is to deal with interrupters.
Establish norms
Have a discussion of group norms. One possible norm: we will not interrupt each other. Post the norms on the wall. Review them at the beginning of each meeting.
Create mechanisms for necessary interruptions
Certain interruptions are helpful. Examples are requests for information, requests to make critical corrections, and requests to modify the group process. Establish key phrases that team members can use to make these requests.
For especially tense topics, get a facilitator
A facilitator who isn't part of the team is more likely to be objective than any team member is. A skilled facilitator knows how to maintain a "queue" of people who want to comment, and provides the trust required to encourage everyone to wait patiently. Executive teams: hire a facilitator from outside the organization.
If you have a serious problem with interruptions, chances are good that you no longer notice. Track interruptions over time. What's the trend? Is there a pattern? Can you do better? TopNext Issue
For an exploration of interruptions from the point of view of the one being interrupted, check out "Let Me Finish, Please," Point Lookout for January 22, 2003.
We had this problem once and instituted a talking stick. You had to have the stick in order to speak. Only when you relinquished it could the next person have the floor. It slowed the meeting a bit but was worth it. An unexpected side effect was that it added some levity to the meeting of a contentious group of people. Plus it made everyone feel like they had the floor and everyone's undivided attention. Better yet, after a few meetings with the talking stick it was no longer necessary and gradually fell from use.
Do you spend your days scurrying from meeting to meeting? Do you ever wonder if all these meetings are really necessary? (They aren't) Or whether there isn't some better way to get this work done? (There is) Read 101 Tips for Effective Meetings to learn how to make meetings much more productive and less stressful — and a lot more rare. Order Now!
Not only was the meeting running over, but it now seemed that the entire far end of the table was having its own meeting. Why are some meetings like this?
Collaborations can be very productive. There are some traps though, especially when the collaborators are of different rank, with the partner of lower rank reporting to a peer of the other. Here are some tips for preventing conflict in diagonal collaborations.
I recently upgraded my email program to a new version that "monitors messages for offensive text." It hasn't worked out well. But the whole affair got me to think about everyday phrases that do tend to set people off. Here's a little catalog.
Rumors about organizational intentions or expectations can depress productivity. Even when they're factually false, rumors can be so powerful that they sometimes produce the results they predict. How can we manage organizational rumors?
Most of us feel recognized, respected and acknowledged when others use our names. And many of us have difficulty remembering the names of others, especially those we don't know well. How can we get better at connecting names and faces?
I offer email and telephone coaching at both corporate and individual rates.
Contact me for details at rbrenner@ChacoCanyon.com
or (617) 491-6289, or toll-free in the continental US at (866) 378-5470.
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Do you ever wonder if all these meetings are really necessary? (They aren't) Or whether there isn't some better way to get this work done? (There is) Read 101 Tips for Effective Meetings to learn how to make meetings more productive — and more rare. Check it out!
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ally looked around the table for anyone who wasn't trying to talk. To her relief, most weren't, but the usual suspects had their megaphones on, blasting each other at full volume. "Hold on, everyone. Hold on!" she said, raising her voice way past the comfort level. Greg — no surprise — was the last to stop.
In a more normal tone, Sally continued: "If we're going to discuss this, we'll have some order in this room. I want only one person talking at a time. Clear?"
Top 
Next IssueDo you spend your days scurrying from meeting to meeting? Do you ever wonder if all these meetings are really necessary? (They aren't) Or whether there isn't some better way to get this work done? (There is) Read 101 Tips for Effective Meetings to learn how to make meetings much more productive and less stressful — and a lot more rare. Order Now!
The Shape of the Table
Diagonal Collaborations: Dazzling or Dangerous?
Dangerous Phrases
There Is No Rumor Mill
Names and Faces
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Ever wonder if there isn't a better way to travel? Travel is essential, but the hassles of travel aren't. Read 202 Tips for Business Travel to learn how to convert business travel from a time-wasting hassle to a breeze. Revised and updated for 2008 with 101 new tips! Check it out!
Projects never go quite as planned. We expect that, but we don't expect disaster. How can we get better at spotting disaster when there's still time to prevent it? How to Spot a Troubled Project Before the Trouble Starts is filled with tips for executives, senior managers, managers of project managers, and sponsors of projects in project-oriented organizations. Check it out!
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Do you ever wonder if all these meetings are really necessary? (They aren't) Or whether there isn't some better way to get this work done? (There is) Read 101 Tips for Effective Meetings to learn how to make meetings more productive — and more rare. Check it out!
Are you fed up with tense, explosive meetings? Are you or a colleague targets of a bully? Read 101 Tips for Managing Conflict to learn how to make peace with conflict. Check it out!
Are your projects always late and over budget? Are your project teams plagued by turnover, burnout, and high defect rates? Turn your culture around. Read 52 Tips for Leaders of Project-Oriented Organizations, filled with tips & techniques for organizational leaders. Check it out!
A Tip a Day arrives by email each business day. It's 20 to 30 words at most, and gives you a new perspective on the hassles and rewards of work life. Most tips also contain links to related articles. Free!
Save a bundle and even more important save time! Order the Combo Package and download all 21 ebooks and tips books at once, for one low price of USD 161.95 vs. USD 332.15, a savings of over 51% compared to ordering them separately.
