Point Lookout: a free weekly publication of Chaco Canyon Consulting
Volume 3, Issue 41;   October 8, 2003: Your Wishing Wand

Your Wishing Wand

by

Wishing — for ourselves, for others, or for all — helps us focus on what we really want. When we know what we really want, we're ready to make the little moves that make it happen. Here's a little user's guide for your wishing wand.

Standing at Jordan's door, Stephanie couldn't stop smiling. That started Jordan smiling, too — he couldn't help it. "Come in, sit," he said to Stephanie. "Spill."

A wishing wand"I wished, and it happened," she began. "I must have magic powers."

"I don't know about that, but tell me what happened." Jordan hated being teased, even a little.

"OK. Day before yesterday, driving home, I'm imagining that Marigold could somehow be kept alive. I'm wishing for the chance to tell Emmons how to fight for it. I work out exactly what I would say. Then yesterday — it's freakish — I get that chance. And today I find out it worked."

"Amazing," said Jordan, "you saved Marigold. Congratulations!"

"Emmons saved Marigold," Stephanie said. "I just wished him the will."

You do have
a wishing wand,
though you might not
be using it often.
Seen it lately?
Stephanie did more than wishing him the will. She showed him the way. She was ready for the opportunity because she had used her wishing wand. You have a wishing wand, too, though you might not be using it often. Maybe a little user's guide will help.

Wish for the possible
Your wishes are more likely to come true if you wish for the possible. A wish to fly like a bird is less likely to come true than a wish for an airline ticket to Tahiti.
Wish for the wonderful
Within the range of the possible, there's plenty of room for the wonderful. Take ten seconds — right now — to wish for something wonderful. See how easy it is?
Wish for good
Wishes for harm to come to anyone are poisonous. The feelings you create while contemplating these wishes are your feelings. They hurt only you.
Wish for yourself, for others, and for all
Wishes in fairy tales are often self-centered. Try wishing for others, and for all of us. Whenever a wish comes true, you feel the same thrill, no matter who benefits.
Not wishing doesn't help
Some of us fear the pain of disappointment when a wish doesn't come true, so we don't wish at all. What a loss! Dealing with disappointment is a critical skill. Wishing gives you opportunities to practice your skill.
If you know what you really, really want, you're a lot more likely to get it
Deciding what to wish for is what does the magic. Deciding helps you focus on some things, and let others go. This makes you more likely to make the little moves that make your dreams come true, and less likely to make the little moves that keep your wishes wishes.

Do you have a wishing wand? Have you ever had one? If you don't have one, make one. Keep it handy. Use it often. Wish for something for yourself, for someone else, and for us all. Go to top Top  Next issue: Devious Political Tactics: The Three-Legged Race  Next Issue

Go For It: Sometimes It's Easier If You RunLove the work but not the job? Bad boss, long commute, troubling ethical questions, hateful colleague? This ebook looks at what we can do to get more out of life at work. It helps you get moving again! Read Go For It! Sometimes It's Easier If You Run, filled with tips and techniques for putting zing into your work life. Order Now!

More about achieving goals

A hiker in the La Primavera calderaCommitment Makes It Easier  [October 16, 2002]
When you face obstacles, sometimes the path around or through them is difficult. Committing yourself to the path lets you focus all your energy on the path you've chosen.

What's in it for him?Beyond WIIFM  [August 13, 2003]
Probably the most widely used tactic of persuasion, "What's In It For Me," or WIIFM, can be toxic to an organization. There's a much healthier approach that provides a competitive advantage to organizations that use it.

A wishing wandYour Wishing Wand  [October 8, 2003]
Wishing — for ourselves, for others, or for all — helps us focus on what we really want. When we know what we really want, we're ready to make the little moves that make it happen. Here's a little user's guide for your wishing wand.

Chair clusterGive It Your All  [May 19, 2004]
If you have the time and resources to read this, you probably have a pretty good situation, or you have what it takes to be looking for one. In many ways, you're one of the fortunate few. Are you making the most of the wonderful things you have? Are you giving it your all?

Using an information kioskKnowing Where You're Going  [April 20, 2005]
Groups that can't even agree on ``Em''what``/Em'' to do can often find themselves debating about ``Em''how``/Em'' to do it. Here are some simple things to remember to help you focus on defining the goal.

The Town of Wescott, Wisconsin is recognized as Tree City 2005Workplace Myths: Motivating People  [July 19, 2006]
Up and down the org chart, you can find bits of business wisdom about motivating people. We generally believe these theories without question. How many of them are true? How many are myths? What are some of these myths and why do they persist?

Lewis and Clark on the Lower ColumbiaAstonishing Successes  [January 31, 2007]
When we have successes that surprise us, we do feel good, but beyond that, our reactions are sometimes self-defeating. What happens when we experience unanticipated success, and how can we handle it better?

US President John Kennedy set a goal of a trip to the moonAchieving Goals: Inspiring Passion and Action  [February 14, 2007]
Achieving your goals requires both passion and action. Knowing when to emphasize passion and when to emphasize action are the keys to managing yourself, or others, toward achievement.

Your comments are welcome

Would you like to see your comments posted here? Send me your comments by email, or by Web form.

About Point Lookout

This article in its entirety was written by a 
          human being. No machine intelligence was involved in any way.Thank you for reading this article. I hope you enjoyed it and found it useful, and that you'll consider recommending it to a friend.

This article in its entirety was written by a human being. No machine intelligence was involved in any way.

Point Lookout is a free weekly email newsletter. Browse the archive of past issues. Subscribe for free.

Support Point Lookout by joining the Friends of Point Lookout, as an individual or as an organization.

Do you face a complex interpersonal situation? Send it in, anonymously if you like, and I'll give you my two cents.

Related articles

More articles on Emotions at Work:

Pencils come with erasers for a reasonWhen You Make a Mistake
We've all made mistakes, and we'll continue to do so for as long as we live. Making mistakes is part of being human. Still, we're often troubled by our mistakes, even when we remember that many mistakes turn out to be great gifts. Why do we have such a hard time acknowledging mistakes?
Too much time on his handsHurtful Clichés: II
Much of our day-to-day conversation consists of harmless clichés: "How goes it?" or "Nice to meet you." Some other clichés aren't harmless, but they're so common that we use them without thinking. Here's Part II of a series exploring some of these clichés.
The Purchasing Managers IndexHow to Avoid a Layoff: The Inside Stuff
These are troubled economic times. Layoffs are becoming increasingly common. Here are some tips for changing your frame of mind to help reduce the chances that you will be laid off.
Ruth Bader Ginsburg in 2016How to Listen to Someone Who's Dead Wrong
Sometimes we must listen attentively to someone with whom we strongly disagree. The urge to interrupt can be overpowering. How can we maintain enough self-control to really listen?
A large audience listening to a speakerGetting Value from Involuntary Seminars
Whatever your organizational role, from time to time you might find yourself attending seminars or presentations involuntarily. The value you derive from these "opportunities" depends as much on you as on the presenter.

See also Emotions at Work and Emotions at Work for more related articles.

Forthcoming issues of Point Lookout

A man in despair, as one might be following a layoffComing April 2: Mitigating the Trauma of Being Laid Off
Trauma is an emotional response to horrible events — accidents, crimes, disasters, physical abuse, emotional abuse, gross injustices — and layoffs. Layoff trauma is real. Employers know how to execute layoffs with compassion, but some act out of cruelty. Know how to defend yourself. Available here and by RSS on April 2.
A common image of bullying in actionAnd on April 9: Defining Workplace Bullying
When we set out to control the incidence of workplace bullying, problem number one is defining bullying behavior. We know much more about bullying in children than we do about adult bullying, and more about adult bullying than we know about workplace bullying. Available here and by RSS on April 9.

Coaching services

I offer email and telephone coaching at both corporate and individual rates. Contact Rick for details at rbrenner@ChacoCanyon.com or (650) 787-6475, or toll-free in the continental US at (866) 378-5470.

Get the ebook!

Past issues of Point Lookout are available in six ebooks:

Reprinting this article

Are you a writer, editor or publisher on deadline? Are you looking for an article that will get people talking and get compliments flying your way? You can have 500-1000 words in your inbox in one hour. License any article from this Web site. More info

Follow Rick

Send email or subscribe to one of my newsletters Follow me at LinkedIn Follow me at X, or share a post Subscribe to RSS feeds Subscribe to RSS feeds
The message of Point Lookout is unique. Help get the message out. Please donate to help keep Point Lookout available for free to everyone.
Technical Debt for Policymakers BlogMy blog, Technical Debt for Policymakers, offers resources, insights, and conversations of interest to policymakers who are concerned with managing technical debt within their organizations. Get the millstone of technical debt off the neck of your organization!
52 Tips for Leaders of Project-Oriented OrganizationsAre your project teams plagued by turnover, burnout, and high defect rates? Turn your culture around.
Go For It: Sometimes It's Easier If You RunBad boss, long commute, troubling ethical questions, hateful colleague? Learn what we can do when we love the work but not the job.
101 Tips for Effective MeetingsLearn how to make meetings more productive — and more rare.
Ebooks, booklets and tip books on project management, conflict, writing email, effective meetings and more.
Comprehensive collection of all e-books and e-bookletsSave a bundle and even more important save time! Order the Combo Package and download all ebooks and tips books at once.
If your teams don't yet consistently achieve state-of-the-art teamwork, check out this catalog. Help is just a few clicks/taps away!