Most complaints about bosses' communication styles are about those who communicate too little. There are a few, though, who just want to gab. They don't have anything to say, they just gab. It's a serious problem for your boss, but you don't have to let it become a problem for you.

A cup of coffee. In many cultures, coffee serves as much more than a beverage. If not coffee, another beverage often serves analogous social functions. One of those functions is sharing. When everyone in a small group is drinking the same beverage, it serves as a kind of social binding, creating connection. That's one reason why inviting someone to accompany you to the coffee station is so effective — it's an invitation that's hard to decline.
Here are some insights and tips to limit the impact of this problem on your own performance.
- Direct or indirect requests probably won't work
- Since your boss is out of bounds, direct requests that the gabbing stop will likely be experienced as criticism or attack. A defensive response or even retribution are probable outcomes. Hinting is dangerous for the same reason, but since hints are less clear, the message is also less likely to arrive.
- Your boss hasn't asked for your help
- Refrain from providing "feedback" or "advice" unless you're asked. Not only is it risky when your boss is involved, but it rarely works unless the person in question asks for it.
- The problem might be only temporary
- If, in your workplace, actual job performance and performance evaluation are correlated, your boss is probably in trouble. Habitually spending so much time so unproductively can't help. If you can wait long enough, the problem will go away, because you'll have a new boss.
- Notice patterns
- Offering feedback rarely works,
because your boss hasn't
asked you for help - Is there a time of day when you're more likely to be targeted? If so, be sure to be somewhere else if you can. If you can't see a pattern, keep a log — you'll know for sure after a few weeks.
- Exploit meeting scheduling software
- Look up your boss's schedule, and plan to be somewhere else when he or she is free. Schedule meetings for those times, or work in a conference room if you can.
- Exploit flextime and telecommuting
- Consider time-shifting your hours. If your boss is a morning person, arrive later. If you can telecommute on some days, do. If asked why you suddenly changed your schedule, say something about "so many interruptions." Keep it impersonal.
- Sign a mutual assistance treaty
- If others are also affected by your boss's chat habit, make a pact with someone else: if you see your boss chatting with your pal, put in a phone call to break up the conversation. Have your pal do the same for you.
If all else fails, pick up your coffee cup and say, "I need some more coffee." Stand, take a step, turn back, and say, "Join me?" Most people will leave your office with you — few will accompany you to the coffee station. If he or she does tag along, continue the conversation, lingering in a public place — don't return to your office. That will usually force a quick end, and you can get back to work.
Which reminds me — time for coffee. Join me? Top
Next Issue
Is every other day a tense, anxious, angry misery as you watch people around you, who couldn't even think their way through a game of Jacks, win at workplace politics and steal the credit and glory for just about everyone's best work including yours? Read 303 Secrets of Workplace Politics, filled with tips and techniques for succeeding in workplace politics. More info
For more about feedback, see "Feedback Fumbles," Point Lookout for April 2, 2003.
Your comments are welcome
Would you like to see your comments posted here? rbrenubcqSvusyBsQaEDwner@ChacfhuriyFKgDguTpuYoCanyon.comSend me your comments by email, or by Web form.About Point Lookout
Thank you for reading this article. I hope you enjoyed it and
found it useful, and that you'll consider recommending it to a friend.
This article in its entirety was written by a human being. No machine intelligence was involved in any way.
Point Lookout is a free weekly email newsletter. Browse the archive of past issues. Subscribe for free.
Support Point Lookout by joining the Friends of Point Lookout, as an individual or as an organization.
Do you face a complex interpersonal situation? Send it in, anonymously if you like, and I'll give you my two cents.
Related articles
More articles on Workplace Politics:
Devious Political Tactics: The Three-Legged Race
- The Three-Legged Race is a tactic that some managers use to avoid giving one person new authority. Some
of the more cynical among us use it to sabotage projects or even careers. How can you survive a three-legged
race?
Devious Political Tactics: Cutouts
- Cutouts are people or procedures that enable political operators to communicate in safety. Using cutouts,
operators can manipulate their environments while limiting their personal risk. How can you detect cutouts?
And what can you do about them?
The Discontinuity Effect: What and Why
- Counterproductive competition is more likely in group-group interactions than in one-to-one or one-to-group
interactions. Why does counterproductive competition happen?
Narcissistic Behavior at Work: VI
- Narcissistic behavior at work distorts decisions, disrupts relationships, and generates toxic conflict.
These consequences limit the ability of the organization to achieve its goals. In this part of our series
we examine the effects of exploiting others for personal ends.
Do My Job
- A popular guideline in modern workplaces is "do your job." The idea is that if we all do our
jobs, success is most likely. But some supervisors demand that subordinates do their own jobs, plus
the jobs of their supervisors. It rarely works out well.
See also Workplace Politics and Workplace Politics for more related articles.
Forthcoming issues of Point Lookout
Coming June 4: White-Collar Contractor Sabotage
- Modern firms in competitive, dynamic markets draw on many types of employer/employee relationships, including contractors. By providing privileges and perks preferentially among these different types, they risk creating a caldron of resentments that can reduce organizational effectiveness. Available here and by RSS on June 4.
And on June 11: More Things I've Learned Along the Way: VI
- When I gain an important insight, or when I learn a lesson, I make a note. Example: If you're interested in changing how a social construct operates, knowing how it came to be the way it is can be much less useful than knowing what keeps it the way it is. Available here and by RSS on June 11.
Coaching services
I offer email and telephone coaching at both corporate and individual rates. Contact Rick for details at rbrenubcqSvusyBsQaEDwner@ChacfhuriyFKgDguTpuYoCanyon.com or (650) 787-6475, or toll-free in the continental US at (866) 378-5470.
Get the ebook!
Past issues of Point Lookout are available in six ebooks:
- Get 2001-2 in Geese Don't Land on Twigs (PDF, )
- Get 2003-4 in Why Dogs Wag (PDF, )
- Get 2005-6 in Loopy Things We Do (PDF, )
- Get 2007-8 in Things We Believe That Maybe Aren't So True (PDF, )
- Get 2009-10 in The Questions Not Asked (PDF, )
- Get all of the first twelve years (2001-2012) in The Collected Issues of Point Lookout (PDF, )
Are you a writer, editor or publisher on deadline? Are you looking for an article that will get people talking and get compliments flying your way? You can have 500-1000 words in your inbox in one hour. License any article from this Web site. More info
Follow Rick
Recommend this issue to a friend
Send an email message to a friend
rbrenubcqSvusyBsQaEDwner@ChacfhuriyFKgDguTpuYoCanyon.comSend a message to Rick
A Tip A Day feed
Point Lookout weekly feed


Beware any resource that speaks of "winning" at workplace politics or "defeating" it. You can benefit or not, but there is no score-keeping, and it isn't a game.
- Wikipedia has a nice article with a list of additional resources
- Some public libraries offer collections. Here's an example from Saskatoon.
- Check my own links collection
- LinkedIn's Office Politics discussion group