Mastering Messaging for Pandemics: II

In Part I of this exploration, I noted several practices for citing dates and times that reduce the probability of confusion. But our messages consist of much more than dates and times. Patterns of language that cause little trouble when spoken can be disastrous in messages, because the feedback loop for the messaging context is so much longer than is the feedback loop for spoken communication. In messaging, the sender might not realize that something has gone amiss until enough time has passed for real trouble to occur.

Here are four examples of patterns that can cause trouble in messaging.

"Can't," "cannot," and "couldn't"

The words can't, cannot, couldn't, and friends, fail to distinguish between willingness, ability, and authority. For example, when Eric was asked how long ago his team lead had told him of the change in requirements, he responded, "I really couldn't say." Was he unwilling? Unable? Not allowed?

When expressing the idea that compliance with a request isn't forthcoming, explaining why not is important. An inability to comply is different from an unwillingness to comply, and both inability and unwillingness differ from lacking the authority to comply. In Eric's case, his response doesn't tell us whether he doesn't know, or he knows but doesn't want to say, or he knows or doesn't know, but in either case, he isn't permitted to say.

In messages, using either can't, cannot, or equivalent terms to express the idea that compliance isn't forthcoming leaves the recipient free to choose an interpretation. And the recipient's choice might lead to trouble for sender, recipient, or both.

Pronouns

Pronouns are words such as it, that, this, those, them, they, him, her, she, he, his, hers, theirs, and their. A pronoun is a word that substitutes for a noun or noun phrase. It refers to a noun or noun phrase previously mentioned in the discourse in which it (the pronoun) appears. The noun or noun phrase to which the pronoun refers is called the referent.

Pronouns Troubles happen in messaging because
feedback loop for the messaging context
is so much longer than is the feedback
loop for spoken communicationcan create problems when their referents are ambiguous or undefined. To remove the ambiguity, simply replace the pronoun with its referent, or leave it in place and follow the pronoun with the referent in parentheses. That's what I did in the previous paragraph where I inserted "(the pronoun)" following it.

A very common source of pronoun ambiguity arises when the conversation topic includes multiple people of the same gender. In that situation, he or she might refer to more than one individual, and confusion can result. When the topic includes multiple people of the same gender, it's safer to use names than pronouns.

Name ambiguity

As noted above, because pronouns can be sources of ambiguity, we must sometimes use personal names to avoid ambiguity when referring to people. But what if two people on the same team, or in the same conversation, share the same familiar name? Or worse, what if they share the same surname as well? Avoiding ambiguity can then become a bit tricky.

Some resort to numbering people: Jennifer Two, or Ali One. Not a good idea. Confusion results when people forget which Jennifer is Jennifer One and which Jennifer is Jennifer Two. And in some cultures, being a One is subjectively regarded as conferring higher status than being a Two. Status differences, especially unearned status differences, can be trouble.

A lower-risk approach is to attach a neutral modifier to the person's familiar name. Geography is usually safe. Examples: "Jennifer in Singapore," or "Ali in New York."

Choose your modifiers carefully. For example, it's dangerous to identify one Ali as the Smart Ali, because that would imply that the other Ali isn't smart.

Homophonic confusions

A homophone is a word that's pronounced the same way as another word, but differs in meaning or (possibly) spelling. For example, in U.S. English, pear/pair/pare are homophones of each other, as are you're/your and rain/rein/reign. A homophonic confusion happens when we type one homophone, but we meant to type another. An example: "We can't bare any shortcomings in our performance."

Text messaging and email messaging are troublesome enough without homophonic confusions. And we can't rely on spell checkers to catch them, because these confusions are usually spelled correctly.

To reduce the incidence of homophonic confusions, we must proofread our messages before sending them. And since these confusions are more likely to occur when we're hurrying, proofreading is the one thing we'd rather not do. So when you're in a hurry, remember: this is exactly the time when proofreading is most important.

The patterns above are four of the fairly common sources of confusion in messaging. There are dozens more. Examples are unusual words, acronyms, initialisms, weirdly complex sentences, and unnoticed but disastrous autocorrect fails. When you notice a confusing pattern not described here, add it to your collection. Use that collection to help you compose messages that are less likely to be sources of trouble. First in this series   Top    Next Issue

Are you so buried in email that you don't even have time to delete your spam? Do you miss important messages? So many of the problems we have with email are actually within our power to solve, if we just realize the consequences of our own actions. Read 101 Tips for Writing and Managing Email to learn how to make peace with your inbox. Order Now!

And if you have organizational responsibility, you can help transform the culture to make more effective use of email. You can reduce volume while you make content more valuable. You can discourage email flame wars and that blizzard of useless if well-intended messages from colleagues and subordinates. Read Where There's Smoke There's Email to learn how to make email more productive at the organizational scale — and less dangerous. Order Now!

Your comments are welcome

About Point Lookout

Thank you for reading this article. I hope you enjoyed it and found it useful, and that you'll consider recommending it to a friend.

Point Lookout is a free weekly email newsletter. Browse the archive of past issues. Subscribe for free.

Support Point Lookout by joining the Friends of Point Lookout, as an individual or as an organization.

Do you face a complex interpersonal situation? Send it in, anonymously if you like, and I'll give you my two cents.

Related articles

More articles on Effective Communication at Work:

Why Dogs Wag Their Tails

If you've ever known a particular dog at all well, you've probably been amazed at how easy it is to guess a dog's mood, even though dogs can't speak. Perhaps what's more amazing is that it's so difficult to guess a person's mood, even though humans can speak.

Peek-a-Boo and Leadership

Great leaders know what to say, what not to say, and when to say or not say it, sometimes with stunning effect. Consistently effective leadership requires superior empathy skills. Here are some things to do to improve your empathy skills.

Achieving Goals: Inspiring Passion and Action

Achieving your goals requires both passion and action. Knowing when to emphasize passion and when to emphasize action are the keys to managing yourself, or others, toward achievement.

Ending Conversations

At times, we need to end the current conversation. It's going nowhere, or we have something important to do, or we just don't want to deal with the other person. Here are some suggestions for ending conversations.

Reframing Hurtful Dismissiveness

Targets of dismissive remarks often feel that their concerns are being judged as unimportant, which can be painful when their concerns are real. But there is an alternative to pain. It requires a little skill and discipline, but it can work.

See also Effective Communication at Work and Virtual and Global Teams for more related articles.

Forthcoming issues of Point Lookout

Coming October 20: On Ineffectual Leaders

When the leader of an important business unit is ineffectual, we need to make a change to protect the organization. Because termination can seem daunting, people often turn to one or more of a variety of other options. Those options have risks. Available here and by RSS on October 20.

And on October 27: Five Guidelines for Choices

Each day we make dozens or hundreds of choices — maybe more. We make many of those choices outside our awareness. But we can make better choices if we can recognize choice patterns that often lead to trouble. Here are five guidelines for making choices. Available here and by RSS on October 27.

Coaching services

I offer email and telephone coaching at both corporate and individual rates. Contact Rick for details at rbrenXEiRBfuFHUtjHrqUner@ChacpYPvvSVhUNIOeXHKoCanyon.com or (650) 787-6475, or toll-free in the continental US at (866) 378-5470.

Get the ebook!

Past issues of Point Lookout are available in six ebooks:

• Get 2001-2 in Geese Don't Land on Twigs (PDF, )
• Get 2003-4 in Why Dogs Wag (PDF, )
• Get 2005-6 in Loopy Things We Do (PDF, )
• Get 2007-8 in Things We Believe That Maybe Aren't So True (PDF, )
• Get 2009-10 in The Questions Not Asked (PDF, )
• Get all of the first twelve years (2001-2012) in The Collected Issues of Point Lookout (PDF, )

Are you a writer, editor or publisher on deadline? Are you looking for an article that will get people talking and get compliments flying your way? You can have 500-1000 words in your inbox in one hour. License any article from this Web site. More info

Public seminars

The Power Affect: How We Express Our Personal Power

Many people who possess real organizational power have a characteristic demeanor. It's the way they project their presence. I call this the power affect. Some people — call them power pretenders — adopt the power affect well before they attain significant organizational power. Unfortunately for their colleagues, and for their organizations, power pretenders can attain organizational power out of proportion to their merit or abilities. Understanding the power affect is therefore important for anyone who aims to attain power, or anyone who works with power pretenders. Read more about this program.

• A recording of a program presented June 29, 2017, Monthly Webinar, sponsored by Technobility Webinar Series. PMI members can earn 1.0 Category 'A' PDU by viewing this program. View this program now.
   
• A recording of a program presented June 29, 2017, Monthly Webinar, sponsored by Technobility Webinar Series. PMI members can earn 1.0 Category 'A' PDU by viewing this program. View this program now.
   

Bullet Points: Mastery or Madness?

Decision makers in modern organizations commonly demand briefings in the form of bullet points or a series of series of bullet points. But this form of presentation has limited value for complex decisions. We need something more. We actually need to think. Briefers who combine the bullet-point format with a variety of persuasion techniques can mislead decision makers, guiding them into making poor decisions. Read more about this program.

• A recording of a program presented June 24, 2020, Monthly Webinar, sponsored by Technobility Webinar Series. PMI members can earn 1.0 Category 'A' PDU by viewing this program. View this program now.
   
• A recording of a program presented June 24, 2020, Monthly Webinar, sponsored by Technobility Webinar Series. PMI members can earn 1.0 Category 'A' PDU by viewing this program. View this program now.