Take Any Seat: I

As the exchange between Michel and Wilson grew more heated, Nicole began to feel more and more threatened. Sitting as she was, right between them, she was directly in the line of fire. Finally, she could keep silent no more. In a tone she regretted even as she spoke, she said, "Will you two please settle down? If you can't, take it outside!"

In meetings, choose
your seat with
strategic goals
in mindMichel and Wilson halted immediately, and although everyone in the meeting — including Nicole — was relieved, Nicole's regret deepened. 'Why couldn't I have kept still?' she thought. 'I wasn't involved and it wasn't my problem.'

Nicole might not have been involved at the content level of the discussion, but the placement of her chair meant that she was involved in the conflict. Her discomfort led her to demand an end to the exchange, and although nothing bad happened this time, such interventions can be risky.

In meetings, where you sit does influence your participation. Since your seat can even affect your status within the meeting, choose your seat with these 12 strategic goals in mind.

As chair, choose carefully

If the room is set in classroom or auditorium style, as chair you have little choice — the front is for you. But if the room has a long table, typically, the chair sits in the "power position" — at one end — even though the power position isn't always so powerful. The effective radius of control of any position is only about 10-15 feet (3-5 meters). If the table is longer than that, or if attendees will be discussing issues, the chair should sit in the middle of one side of the long table, for better control.

If you plan to participate, sit in a central location

Sitting near the center of action of the meeting gives you an advantage if you want to contribute or influence the flow of the meeting. If you aren't a key contributor, and if you want to stay out of the action, choose a corner.

Sit next to your trouble

If you expect hostile or tense exchanges with someone, choose a nearby seat, preferably to the person's right. Sitting in easy line of sight can invite confrontation, especially if both of you are male. Sitting side-by-side is less threatening and can even be friendly.

Stay out of the line of fire

If you anticipate that two other attendees might engage in a heated exchange, put some space between you and them. Avoid sitting in the line of fire, and avoid sitting near either one, unless you want to express your feelings of allegiance to one party.

Meeting dynamics are complicated — we all affect each other in ways we might not realize. In meetings, where you stand depends in part on where you sit.  Top    Next Issue

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This is Part I of a two-part article. See "Take Any Seat: II," Point Lookout for June 2, 2004, for more.

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Coming October 4: Self-Importance and Conversational Narcissism at Work: I

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And on October 11: Self-Importance and Conversational Narcissism at Work: II

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