You're leading a team of some kind, and one of the team members has been severely injured or or has been stricken with a serious illness. I'll call him Andy. The team doesn't know about it yet, but, everyone knows him personally and when they find out, everyone will feel loss or worry.
In Part I, we explored what to do to prepare before you talk to the team. In this Part II, we look at what to say and how to say it.
- Tell the team what you can about Andy's near future
- Whatever you say must respect organizational policy and Andy's personal preferences. You might know his condition, and you might know his location and whether he's receiving visitors (he probably isn't yet). If you can, provide an address (or tell them when you will) for those who wish to send cards or good wishes.
- You probably don't know when or whether he'll be returning. It's best to say this as, "I don't yet know when Andy will be back." Telling people that you don't know whether he'll be back is probably unhelpful.
- Offer team members what they might need
- Some team members might benefit from counseling, though this is rare in the case of injury or illness. It probably isn't necessary to offer counseling to everyone, but be attentive to special cases.
- Beware: the event might have exposed previously hidden factors. For instance, Andy might be involved in an affair with another team member, who could be severely upset, and who might also be unwilling or unable to visit Andy because of privacy concerns. Private counseling might be desirable for both. Sensitivity on your part is a valuable asset.
- Beware the complexity of virtual relationships
- Some team members might have close virtual relationships with Andy. They might be thousands of miles away, and perhaps they have never met, but the emotional impact of the event can be every bit as painful and disruptive as if they were co-located.
- Contact remote or traveling team members in advance by telephone, and give them the news privately. Don't leave anything in voicemail other than a request for a return call. Ask for confidentiality until you talk to the rest of the team.
- It isn't necessary to have a new
plan immediately. Indeed, if you
do, you risk appearing over-eager
to replace the one stricken
- Announce that you'll be re-planning the work
- It isn't necessary to have a new plan immediately. Indeed, if you do, you risk appearing over-eager to replace Andy. Announce that some assignments might change, and that you might introduce new resources. Estimate a date by which you expect changes, and ask for their patience.
- Beware asking for input from the team generally, because resource allocation and scheduling is your job. Consulting some team members is fine, but do so with discretion.
Are your projects always (or almost always) late and over budget? Are your project teams plagued by turnover, burnout, and high defect rates? Turn your culture around. Read 52 Tips for Leaders of Project-Oriented Organizations, filled with tips and techniques for organizational leaders. Order Now!
Your comments are welcomeWould you like to see your comments posted here? rbrenuQKLUMsVubCpqOpqner@ChacCCvpZbzKGsgliMGNoCanyon.comSend me your comments by email, or by Web form.
About Point Lookout
Thank you for reading this article. I hope you enjoyed it and found it useful, and that you'll consider recommending it to a friend.
Support Point Lookout by joining the Friends of Point Lookout, as an individual or as an organization.
Do you face a complex interpersonal situation? Send it in, anonymously if you like, and I'll give you my two cents.
More articles on Emotions at Work:
- Dealing with Your Own Anger
- However perceptive we become about what can anger us, we still do get angry once in a while. Here are
four steps to help you deal with your own anger.
- You Remind Me of Helen Hunt
- At a dinner party I attended recently, Kris said to Suzanne, "You remind me of Helen Hunt."
I looked at Suzanne, and sure enough, she did look like Helen Hunt. Later, I noticed that I
was seeing Suzanne a little differently. These are the effects of hat hanging. At work, it can damage
careers and even businesses.
- Coping with Problems
- How we cope with problems is a choice. When we choose our coping style, we help determine our ability
to address the problems we face. Of eight styles we can identify, only one is universally constructive,
and we rarely use it.
- Hurtful Clichés: I
- Much of our day-to-day conversation consists of harmless clichés: "How goes it?" or
"Nice to meet you." Some other clichés aren't harmless, but they're so common that
we use them without thinking. Maybe it's time for some thought.
- Animosity Patterns
- Animosity between two people at work is often attributed to "personality clashes." While sometimes
people can't get along, animosity can also be a tool for accomplishing strictly political ends. Here's
a short catalog of some of its uses.
Forthcoming issues of Point Lookout
- Coming July 8: Multi-Expert Consensus
- Some working groups consist of experts from many fields. When they must reach a decision by consensus, members have several options. Defining those options in advance can help the group reach a decision with all its relationships intact. Available here and by RSS on July 8.
- And on July 15: Disjoint Concept Vocabularies
- In disputes or in problem solving sessions, when we can't seem to come to agreement, we often attribute the difficulty to miscommunication, histories of disagreements, hidden agendas, or "personality clashes." Sometimes the cause is much simpler. Sometimes the concept vocabularies of the parties don't overlap. Available here and by RSS on July 15.
I offer email and telephone coaching at both corporate and individual rates. Contact Rick for details at rbrenuQKLUMsVubCpqOpqner@ChacCCvpZbzKGsgliMGNoCanyon.com or (650) 787-6475, or toll-free in the continental US at (866) 378-5470.
Get the ebook!
Past issues of Point Lookout are available in six ebooks:
- Get 2001-2 in Geese Don't Land on Twigs (PDF, )
- Get 2003-4 in Why Dogs Wag (PDF, )
- Get 2005-6 in Loopy Things We Do (PDF, )
- Get 2007-8 in Things We Believe That Maybe Aren't So True (PDF, )
- Get 2009-10 in The Questions Not Asked (PDF, )
- Get all of the first twelve years (2001-2012) in The Collected Issues of Point Lookout (PDF, )
Are you a writer, editor or publisher on deadline? Are you looking for an article that will get people talking and get compliments flying your way? You can have 500 words in your inbox in one hour. License any article from this Web site. More info
- The Power Affect: How We Express Our Personal Power
Many people who possess real organizational power have a characteristic demeanor. It's the way they project their presence. I call this the power affect. Some people — call them power pretenders — adopt the power affect well before they attain significant organizational power. Unfortunately for their colleagues, and for their organizations, power pretenders can attain organizational power out of proportion to their merit or abilities. Understanding the power affect is therefore important for anyone who aims to attain power, or anyone who works with power pretenders. Read more about this program.
- Bullet Points: Mastery or Madness?
Decision-makers in modern organizations commonly demand briefings in the form of bullet points or a series of series of bullet points. But this form of presentation has limited value for complex decisions. We need something more. We actually need to think. Briefers who combine the bullet-point format with a variety of persuasion techniques can mislead decision-makers, guiding them into making poor decisions. Read more about this program.