The dictionary definition of belligerence is "…a hostile or warlike attitude, nature, or inclination." Because that covers so much territory, I want to consider — for now — just a small part of it. Overt belligerence is belligerence that's unconcealed and on display for all to see. It might be accidentally revealed, as in a display of anger, or it might be quite intentionally used as a tool, for example, in an attempt to intimidate an individual or group, or an attempt to disrupt a meeting.
Let me make the topic narrower still. Those who are belligerent by nature become known to all rather quickly in today's team-oriented workplaces. Unless the belligerent-by-nature possess great organizational power, they don't last long. So — again, for now — let me focus on the kind of belligerence that's associated with a hostile or warlike attitude, or inclination, and let me set aside the kind of belligerence that arises from the nature of the belligerent.
One more refinement. Belligerent behavior between two individuals in private at work can be expensive. For example, they might need to work together effectively to accomplish an important organizational goal. If they cannot accomplish that goal, the costs can be unbearable. But belligerent behavior in group settings — usually we call them "meetings" — can be far more expensive, because so many more people are involved, and the clock is running. That's my focus for now: overt belligerence in meetings, when the belligerence arises from a hostile attitude or inclination.
In this article, Belligerent behavior in group
settings can be expensive, because
so many people are involved,
and the clock is runningI'll address a generic belligerence situation. There are specific situations for which specific responses might be more effective, but the generic situation is a good place to start to illustrate general principles. Send me mail if you have a specific case you'd like me to examine.
In what follows, I'll use the name Brad to indicate the person whose behavior is belligerent.
In dealing with any objector one must begin by determining whether the objector is a sincere objector or a belligerent. The difference between a sincere objector and a belligerent can be subtle, because the objections of both can be sincere. The distinguishing characteristic of the belligerent — Brad — is this: although the objection is sincere, the attack itself is what really motivates him. For the belligerent, the attack is the thing. An example might clarify the distinction.
Typically, belligerent behavior involves registering some kind of complaint, in the form of an attack. Brad might attack almost anything: an individual, a decision, the meeting chair, the scribe, the agenda, whatever. And when someone defends the person or thing Brad attacked, he won't give up, even when everyone else in the meeting considers the defense adequate.
For example, in an attack on the agenda, Brad might object to the order. He might insist that Agenda Item 4 be placed in the Agenda Item 1 position. When the chair explains that Item 4 requires the decision the team will make after discussing Item 1, Brad objects to that, asserting that Item 4 can be addressed independently. He keeps objecting, no matter what anyone says. At some point, he begins objecting to everyone defending the current agenda order, saying that people are ganging up on him and won't let him speak. And so on, escalating ever more intensely into antagonism.
Engaging with Brad on the level of the content of his complaints is futile, because for Brad, the attack is the thing. Still, we're obliged to try it, because we cannot know a priori whether his complaint is substantive. But after peeling away two or three layers of the onion of his attacks, only to find attacks underneath, further engagement at the level of content is probably misguided.
Once it has become clear that the attacks will continue — that content-based responses are unlikely to mollify the attacker — what is there for the chair to do? There are three options. Most chairs, in my experience, keep trying to deal with the content of Brad's objections. As I've said, that rarely works.
A second option is to declare a recess. During the recess, the chair can try to work with Brad in an effort to persuade him to cease his objections. Something like, "I'll resume the meeting if you will assure me that you will cease your objections. Then later, we can discuss them privately. If you don't agree, or if you register more objections after we resume, I'll end the meeting." Brad might accept this, because he sees it as an opportunity to raise more objections. In situations I've witnessed, it does sometimes work. When the meeting resumes, Brad does sometimes "behave."
A third option is declaring the meeting ended, without negotiating with Brad. Afterwards, you can engage with Brad, and possibly his supervisor, on the subject of his disruptive behavior. This option is especially attractive if Brad has exhibited a pattern of disruptive behavior over several meetings, or if you've already tried the second option and Brad has reneged on his commitment to "behave."
Unless you supervise Brad yourself, the ultimate responsibility for resolving this issue lies with his supervisor. For suggestions about such situations, see "Performance Issues for Nonsupervisors," Point Lookout for July 12, 2017. A resolution that brings an end to the belligerence might not lie within your reach. Top Next Issue
Is every other day a tense, anxious, angry misery as you watch people around you, who couldn't even think their way through a game of Jacks, win at workplace politics and steal the credit and glory for just about everyone's best work including yours? Read 303 Secrets of Workplace Politics, filled with tips and techniques for succeeding in workplace politics. More info
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More articles on Conflict Management:
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think, action is not a good idea. How can we engage our brains for the really scary problems?
- Untangling Tangled Threads
- In energetic discussions, topics and subtopics get intertwined. The tangles can be frustrating. Here's
a collection of techniques for minimizing tangles in complex discussions.
- When Over-Delivering Makes Trouble
- When responding to inquiries such as "Is that correct?" we sometimes err by giving too many
reasons why it's incorrect. Patterns of over-delivery can lead to serious trouble. Here's how.
- On Assigning Responsibility for Creating Trouble
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by language, stereotypes, and the assumptions we make about others.
- The Risks of Rehearsals
- Rehearsing a conversation can be constructive. But when we're anxious about it, we can imagine how it
would unfold in ways that bias our perceptions. We risk deluding ourselves about possible outcomes,
and we might even experience stress unnecessarily.
Forthcoming issues of Point Lookout
- Coming February 1: The Big Power of Little Words
- Big, fancy words, like commensurate or obfuscation, tend to be more noticed than the little everyday words, like yet or best. That might be why the little words can be so much more powerful, steering conversations where their users want them to go. Available here and by RSS on February 1.
- And on February 8: Kerfuffles That Seem Like Something More
- Much of what we regard as political conflict is a series of squabbles commonly called kerfuffles. They captivate us while they're underway, but after a month or two they're forgotten. Why do they happen? Why do they persist? Available here and by RSS on February 8.
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