Sally looked around the table for anyone who wasn't trying to talk. To her relief, most weren't, but the usual suspects had their megaphones on, blasting each other at full volume. "Hold on, everyone. Hold on!" she said, raising her voice way past the comfort level. Greg — no surprise — was the last to stop.
In a more normal tone, Sally continued: "If we're going to discuss this, we'll have some order in this room. I want only one person talking at a time. Clear?"
In her attempt to bring order to chaos, Sally has just intervened, but she's unlikely to be successful unless she can enroll the entire group in the effort.
Chaotic, interrupt-driven discussions are expensive. Here are some of the costs that we can avoid with more orderly exchanges:
- Delays and confusion
- When we interrupt people, we sometimes prevent them from making their points in the way they planned. This introduces delays and confusion, if they ever actually make their points.
- Lost contributions
- Often we put the
responsibility for order
(or disorder) in a meeting
on the shoulders of
the meeting chair,
but everyone in
the room plays a role
- Some people are especially sensitive to interruption. Some hold back, for fear of interrupting someone. Others are intimidated by the prospect of being interrupted. In an atmosphere of interruption, the group loses access to much of its creativity.
- Erosion of self-esteem
- When some people are interrupted, they can feel devalued. The interruption can be painful and humiliating, and it can move them to anger, even if they don't express it in the meeting. These effects can extend beyond that meeting and beyond that team.
Often we put the responsibility for order (or disorder) on the shoulders of the meeting chair, but everyone in the room plays a role. Even those who sit quietly have the choice of objecting to the disorder. Here are some tips for maintaining order.
- Prevention is easier than repair
- It's much easier to create an environment in which people resist the temptation to interrupt than it is to deal with interrupters.
- Establish norms
- Have a discussion of group norms. One possible norm: we will not interrupt each other. Post the norms on the wall. Review them at the beginning of each meeting.
- Create mechanisms for necessary interruptions
- Certain interruptions are helpful. Examples are requests for information, requests to make critical corrections, and requests to modify the group process. Establish key phrases that team members can use to make these requests.
- For especially tense topics, get a facilitator
- A facilitator who isn't part of the team is more likely to be objective than any team member is. A skilled facilitator knows how to maintain a "queue" of people who want to comment, and provides the trust required to encourage everyone to wait patiently. Executive teams: hire a facilitator from outside the organization.
Do you spend your days scurrying from meeting to meeting? Do you ever wonder if all these meetings are really necessary? (They aren't) Or whether there isn't some better way to get this work done? (There is) Read 101 Tips for Effective Meetings to learn how to make meetings much more productive and less stressful — and a lot more rare. Order Now!
For an exploration of interruptions from the point of view of the one being interrupted, check out "Let Me Finish, Please," Point Lookout for January 22, 2003.
- Mary Pope
- We had this problem once and instituted a talking stick. You had to have the stick in order to speak. Only when you relinquished it could the next person have the floor. It slowed the meeting a bit but was worth it. An unexpected side effect was that it added some levity to the meeting of a contentious group of people. Plus it made everyone feel like they had the floor and everyone's undivided attention. Better yet, after a few meetings with the talking stick it was no longer necessary and gradually fell from use.
Your comments are welcome
Would you like to see your comments posted here? rbrenuQKLUMsVubCpqOpqner@ChacCCvpZbzKGsgliMGNoCanyon.comSend me your comments by email, or by Web form.
About Point Lookout
Thank you for reading this article. I hope you enjoyed it and found it useful, and that you'll consider recommending it to a friend.
Support Point Lookout by joining the Friends of Point Lookout, as an individual or as an organization.
Do you face a complex interpersonal situation? Send it in, anonymously if you like, and I'll give you my two cents.
More articles on Personal, Team, and Organizational Effectiveness:
- Working Journals
- Keeping a journal about your work can change how you work. You can record why you did what you did,
and why you didn't do what you didn't. You can record what you saw and what you only thought you saw.
And when you read the older entries, you can see patterns you might never have noticed any other way.
- How to Procrastinate
- You probably know many techniques for procrastinating, and use them regularly, but vociferously deny
doing so. That's what makes this such a delicate subject that I've been delaying writing this article.
Well, those days are over.
- Virtual Presentations
- Modern team efforts almost certainly involve teleconferences, and many teleconferences include presentations,
often augmented with video or graphics. Delivering these virtual presentations effectively requires
an approach tailored to the medium.
- Four Popular Ways to Mismanage Layoffs: I
- When layoffs are necessary, the problems they are meant to address are sometimes exacerbated by mismanagement
of the layoff itself. Here is Part I of a discussion of four common patterns of mismanagement, and some
suggestions for those managers and other employees who recognize the patterns in their own companies.
- Bottlenecks: II
- When some people take on so much work that they become "bottlenecks," they expose the organization
to risks. Managing those risks is a first step to ending the bottlenecking pattern.
Forthcoming issues of Point Lookout
- Coming July 8: Multi-Expert Consensus
- Some working groups consist of experts from many fields. When they must reach a decision by consensus, members have several options. Defining those options in advance can help the group reach a decision with all its relationships intact. Available here and by RSS on July 8.
- And on July 15: Disjoint Concept Vocabularies
- In disputes or in problem solving sessions, when we can't seem to come to agreement, we often attribute the difficulty to miscommunication, histories of disagreements, hidden agendas, or "personality clashes." Sometimes the cause is much simpler. Sometimes the concept vocabularies of the parties don't overlap. Available here and by RSS on July 15.
I offer email and telephone coaching at both corporate and individual rates. Contact Rick for details at rbrenuQKLUMsVubCpqOpqner@ChacCCvpZbzKGsgliMGNoCanyon.com or (650) 787-6475, or toll-free in the continental US at (866) 378-5470.
Get the ebook!
Past issues of Point Lookout are available in six ebooks:
- Get 2001-2 in Geese Don't Land on Twigs (PDF, )
- Get 2003-4 in Why Dogs Wag (PDF, )
- Get 2005-6 in Loopy Things We Do (PDF, )
- Get 2007-8 in Things We Believe That Maybe Aren't So True (PDF, )
- Get 2009-10 in The Questions Not Asked (PDF, )
- Get all of the first twelve years (2001-2012) in The Collected Issues of Point Lookout (PDF, )
Are you a writer, editor or publisher on deadline? Are you looking for an article that will get people talking and get compliments flying your way? You can have 500 words in your inbox in one hour. License any article from this Web site. More info
- The Power Affect: How We Express Our Personal Power
Many people who possess real organizational power have a characteristic demeanor. It's the way they project their presence. I call this the power affect. Some people — call them power pretenders — adopt the power affect well before they attain significant organizational power. Unfortunately for their colleagues, and for their organizations, power pretenders can attain organizational power out of proportion to their merit or abilities. Understanding the power affect is therefore important for anyone who aims to attain power, or anyone who works with power pretenders. Read more about this program.
- Bullet Points: Mastery or Madness?
Decision-makers in modern organizations commonly demand briefings in the form of bullet points or a series of series of bullet points. But this form of presentation has limited value for complex decisions. We need something more. We actually need to think. Briefers who combine the bullet-point format with a variety of persuasion techniques can mislead decision-makers, guiding them into making poor decisions. Read more about this program.