Making Memories to Cherish

Every waking moment of every day, and some non-waking moments, we make memories. Most vanish before the day is done; very few last a week. Some good memories return when reminders come along, but most are forever lost. We deal with this by keeping diaries, taking photos, or telling stories, and it all helps…a little.

In quiet moments, reflecting on cherished memories, with loved ones or alone, we can feel the happiness. It's so easy to do that we rarely think about the effort. Whenever we want to feel happy, we can remember a beautiful landscape, the smell of a wood fire, the smiles of loved ones, or even their touch.

These memories don't come from diaries or photos or stories — they come from deep within. Take some time to inventory how many wonderful memories you have. However many you find, you might notice two things. You'll be very happy about them, and you'll probably want more. You might think, 'I wish I could remember Grandma more clearly,' or your first love, or your teammates on the day of that great victory, and on and on.

Fortunately, there is something you can do, more powerful than diaries or photos or stories or anything you can buy. You can prepare yourself to create cherished memories. Once you're prepared, it happens almost automatically. Here are some suggestions for preparing to make memories to cherish.

Make happen what you most want to happen

You're much more likely to remember something if you really wanted it to happen. Do what you can — everything you can — to make it happen.

Illuminate the people around you

Memories of others are more vivid when those others are vivid, when there is enough emotional light. Light up the people around you, make them bright, make them glow.

Filter the details

In everyday mode, we attend to everyday details — what's for dinner, when do I have to be there, what to wear. But when preparing to make memories, these details fade compared to the details that truly matter: Am I breathing? Where am I? What is around me? What is that aroma? What is she wearing? What is the shape of his smile? How does the light look in their eyes?

Light up the people around
you, make them bright,
make them glow

Turn on the recorder

Take in all the details of right now, as if you were experiencing them for the last time, because you are. Think of it as turning on the recorder. You might have to search for your own Record Button, but stay with it — you will find it.

Most important, to remember an experience, you must experience it. To experience it, you must be fully in it. These suggestions are for preparing to make memories. Thinking about the preparations while you're in the experience can take you out of the experience. Prepare first, then do.  Top    Next Issue

Love the work but not the job? Bad boss, long commute, troubling ethical questions, hateful colleague? This ebook looks at what we can do to get more out of life at work. It helps you get moving again! Read Go For It! Sometimes It's Easier If You Run, filled with tips and techniques for putting zing into your work life. Order Now!

Your comments are welcome

About Point Lookout

Thank you for reading this article. I hope you enjoyed it and found it useful, and that you'll consider recommending it to a friend.

Point Lookout is a free weekly email newsletter. Browse the archive of past issues. Subscribe for free.

Support Point Lookout by joining the Friends of Point Lookout, as an individual or as an organization.

Do you face a complex interpersonal situation? Send it in, anonymously if you like, and I'll give you my two cents.

Related articles

More articles on Emotions at Work:

The Unappreciative Boss

Do you work for a boss who doesn't appreciate you? Do you feel ignored or excessively criticized? If you do, life can be a misery, if you make it so. Or you can work around it. It's up to you to choose.

Responding to Threats: I

Threats are one form of communication common to many organizational cultures, especially as pressure mounts. Understanding the varieties of threats can be helpful in determining a response that fits for you.

Unintended Consequences

Sometimes, when we solve problems, the solutions create new problems that can be worse than the problems we solve. Why does this happen? How can we limit this effect?

Blind Agendas

Effective meetings have agendas. But even if a meeting has an agenda, the hidden agendas of participants can cause trouble. Another source of trouble, less frequently recognized, is the blind agenda.

When Change Is Hard: I

Sometimes changing organizations goes smoothly. More often, it doesn't. Whatever methodology we use — and there are many methodologies available — difficulties can arise. When change is hard, what's happening? What makes change hard?

See also Emotions at Work for more related articles.

Forthcoming issues of Point Lookout

Coming December 2: Anticipating Absence: Why

Knowledge workers are scientists, engineers, physicians, attorneys, and any other professionals who "think for a living." When they suddenly become unavailable because of the Coronavirus Pandemic, substituting someone else to carry on for them can be problematic, because skills and experience are not enough. Available here and by RSS on December 2.

And on December 9: Anticipating Absence: How

Knowledge workers are professionals who "think for a living." When they suddenly become unavailable because of the pandemic, we consider substituting someone else. But substitutes need much more than skills and experience to succeed. Available here and by RSS on December 9.

Coaching services

I offer email and telephone coaching at both corporate and individual rates. Contact Rick for details at rbrenmhXARWRMUvVyOdHlner@ChacxgDmtwOKrxnripPCoCanyon.com or (650) 787-6475, or toll-free in the continental US at (866) 378-5470.

Get the ebook!

Past issues of Point Lookout are available in six ebooks:

• Get 2001-2 in Geese Don't Land on Twigs (PDF, )
• Get 2003-4 in Why Dogs Wag (PDF, )
• Get 2005-6 in Loopy Things We Do (PDF, )
• Get 2007-8 in Things We Believe That Maybe Aren't So True (PDF, )
• Get 2009-10 in The Questions Not Asked (PDF, )
• Get all of the first twelve years (2001-2012) in The Collected Issues of Point Lookout (PDF, )

Are you a writer, editor or publisher on deadline? Are you looking for an article that will get people talking and get compliments flying your way? You can have 500 words in your inbox in one hour. License any article from this Web site. More info

Public seminars

The Power Affect: How We Express Our Personal Power

Many people who possess real organizational power have a characteristic demeanor. It's the way they project their presence. I call this the power affect. Some people — call them power pretenders — adopt the power affect well before they attain significant organizational power. Unfortunately for their colleagues, and for their organizations, power pretenders can attain organizational power out of proportion to their merit or abilities. Understanding the power affect is therefore important for anyone who aims to attain power, or anyone who works with power pretenders. Read more about this program.

• A recording of a program presented June 29, 2017, Monthly Webinar, sponsored by Technobility Webinar Series. PMI members can earn 1.0 Category 'A' PDU by viewing this program. View this program now.
   
• A recording of a program presented June 29, 2017, Monthly Webinar, sponsored by Technobility Webinar Series. PMI members can earn 1.0 Category 'A' PDU by viewing this program. View this program now.
   

Bullet Points: Mastery or Madness?

Decision-makers in modern organizations commonly demand briefings in the form of bullet points or a series of series of bullet points. But this form of presentation has limited value for complex decisions. We need something more. We actually need to think. Briefers who combine the bullet-point format with a variety of persuasion techniques can mislead decision-makers, guiding them into making poor decisions. Read more about this program.

• A recording of a program presented June 24, Monthly Webinar, sponsored by Technobility Webinar Series. PMI members can earn 1.0 Category 'A' PDU by viewing this program. View this program now.
   
• A recording of a program presented June 24, Monthly Webinar, sponsored by Technobility Webinar Series. PMI members can earn 1.0 Category 'A' PDU by viewing this program. View this program now.