At the Sound of the Tone, Hang Up

On the last morning of my visit to my brother and his family, I'm sitting at breakfast with my nieces. I have a mid-morning flight. As I spoon some cereal, the eight-year-old asks, "Uncle Ricky, when you were little, did they have airplanes?"

I suddenly feel old. "Yes, we did," I reply. "But there were some things we didn't have." I search the room. "Answering machines, for one."

"Really, no answering machines? Who answered the phone like when you weren't there?"

"Nobody."

There's just no end to the curiosity of an eight-year-old. "What happened when someone called and nobody answered?"

"Well, I guess it rang for a while, and then they gave up. If it was important enough, they called back later."

You probably know how it went from there — I almost missed my flight.

What did we do without answering machines? Today, we have answering machines and voice mailboxes at home, at work, and on cell. Some of us even have assistants who take messages.

And the people we call are similarly equipped. Whenever we call, except in the rare event that we actually reach someone, we have an opportunity to leave word. And we almost always do leave word.

Make answering the phone
a choice. Consider turning off
the ringer when you're
doing something important.We play phone tag, leave messages, listen to messages, replay messages, jot down what people say in messages, and track whose turn it is to call. And if we're owed a call, and don't receive it in a timely fashion, we sometimes feel angry, frustrated, ignored, or unimportant. When we owe a call, and somehow don't get around to it, we can feel guilty. Too often, it's all a waste of our time and our energy.

We've let call-answering technology get out of control. Here are some reminders of the choices we sometimes forget we have.

Decide whether to answer

When the phone rings, we answer without even thinking about not answering. Make answering the phone a choice. Consider turning off the ringer when you're doing something important.

Decide whether to leave a message

Before you phone someone, consider what to do if you get a voice mailbox. Make a conscious choice: do you really want to leave a message? Or would you rather call back later, send email, or do nothing?

Decide how to set your answering system

You can turn it off altogether, or set it to announcement mode: "I'm not taking messages or calls just now, please send email or call back after 4 PM." This reduces both the number of messages you have to listen to, and the number of calls you have to return. Close friends and family with urgent business probably have your cell anyway.

Your comments are important to me, so please send me email. My voice mailbox is full.  Top    Next Issue

The article you've been reading is an archived issue of Point Lookout, my weekly newsletter. I've been publishing it since January, 2001, free to all subscribers, over the Web, and via RSS. You can help keep it free by donating either as an individual or as an organization. You'll receive in return my sincere thanks — and the comfort of knowing that you've helped to propagate insights and perspectives that can help make our workplaces a little more human-friendly. More

Your comments are welcome

About Point Lookout

Thank you for reading this article. I hope you enjoyed it and found it useful, and that you'll consider recommending it to a friend.

This article in its entirety was written by a human being. No machine intelligence was involved in any way.

Point Lookout is a free weekly email newsletter. Browse the archive of past issues. Subscribe for free.

Support Point Lookout by joining the Friends of Point Lookout, as an individual or as an organization.

Do you face a complex interpersonal situation? Send it in, anonymously if you like, and I'll give you my two cents.

Related articles

More articles on Personal, Team, and Organizational Effectiveness:

What Haven't I Told You?

When a project team hits a speed bump, it often learns that it had all the information it needed to avoid the problem, sometimes months in advance of uncovering it. Here's a technique for discovering this kind of knowledge more systematically.

Critical Thinking and Midnight Pizza

When we notice patterns or coincidences, we draw conclusions about things we can't or didn't directly observe. Sometimes the conclusions are right, and sometimes not. When they're not, organizations, careers, and people can suffer. To be right more often, we must master critical thinking.

Personal Trade Secrets

Do you have some little secret tricks you use that make you and your team more effective? Do you wish you could know what secret tricks others have? Here's a way to share your secrets without risk.

Creating Toxic Conflict: I

Many managers seem to operate as if their primary goal is to create toxic conflict among their subordinates. Here's a collection of methods for sowing toxic conflict that can help bad managers become worse managers.

Be Choosier About Job Offers: I

A serious error some job seekers make is accepting an offer that isn't actually a good fit. We make this mistake for a variety of reasons, including hating the job-search process, desperation, and wishful thinking. How can we avoid the error?

See also Personal, Team, and Organizational Effectiveness for more related articles.

Forthcoming issues of Point Lookout

Coming July 3: Additive bias…or Not: II

Additive bias is a cognitive bias that many believe contributes to bloat of commercial products. When we change products to make them more capable, additive bias might not play a role, because economic considerations sometimes favor additive approaches. Available here and by RSS on July 3.

And on July 10: On Delegating Accountability: I

As the saying goes, "You can't delegate your own accountability." Despite wide knowledge of this aphorism, people try it from time to time, especially when overcome by the temptation of a high-risk decision. What can you delegate, and how can you do it? Available here and by RSS on July 10.

Coaching services

I offer email and telephone coaching at both corporate and individual rates. Contact Rick for details at rbrendPtoGuFOkTSMQOzxner@ChacEgGqaylUnkmwIkkwoCanyon.com or (650) 787-6475, or toll-free in the continental US at (866) 378-5470.

Get the ebook!

Past issues of Point Lookout are available in six ebooks:

• Get 2001-2 in Geese Don't Land on Twigs (PDF, )
• Get 2003-4 in Why Dogs Wag (PDF, )
• Get 2005-6 in Loopy Things We Do (PDF, )
• Get 2007-8 in Things We Believe That Maybe Aren't So True (PDF, )
• Get 2009-10 in The Questions Not Asked (PDF, )
• Get all of the first twelve years (2001-2012) in The Collected Issues of Point Lookout (PDF, )

Are you a writer, editor or publisher on deadline? Are you looking for an article that will get people talking and get compliments flying your way? You can have 500-1000 words in your inbox in one hour. License any article from this Web site. More info