Evan felt the anger building again. He couldn't compile the monthly summaries until he had reports from every task leader, and Jeff was always last — and always late. And that made Evan's summary late. How could Jeff get away with this stuff, month after month?
Not long ago, Evan and Jeff had been good friends. Evan had tried asking nicely for the reports, but finally he felt compelled to send some nasty emails copied to Jeff's boss. These "tweaking CCs" (see "The Tweaking CC," Point Lookout for February 7, 2001) had probably ruined their friendship, but if the summaries were late, the company might have lost the contract, and Evan would have been responsible. He had sacrificed his friendship with Jeff because he felt personally responsible for meeting the contract requirements. Evan had taken on the full load.
We're taking on the full load when we feel fully responsible for the success or failure of some group activity. We forget that group success or failure depends on contributions from many people. Instead of seeking help, we take extreme measures to execute responsibilities that might not even be ours.
When we feel fully responsible
for the success or failure
of some group activity,
we might be taking on
the full loadWhile we often credit or blame leadership for organizational success or failure, no job — not even CEO — has full responsibility. Everyone has some responsibility, but no matter what your role, the company can always bloom or wither as a result of the actions of others. None of us is fully responsible.
Yet many of us assume that success depends on us alone. Some common reasons:
- I've been told that I'm responsible.
- Nobody actually told me so, but I know it's expected of me.
- If I don't do it, who will? And if nobody does it, we'll all sink.
- If this doesn't get done, we'll fail as a company.
If you find that you're taking on the full load, consider these possibilities:
- Your job might have been badly designed — it might have too much responsibility.
- You might believe that you're responsible, but it might be only your belief.
- If you don't do it, someone else might.
- Perhaps the company should fail.
When you take on the full load, you risk your career, your family, and your health:
- You put your own health at risk. Stress, sleep disorders, heart disease, depression, and shortened life are possible consequences.
- The quality of your work can degrade, as emotional and health problems develop.
- You risk your relationships with co-workers.
- You risk your relationships with family and friends. Marriages can fail.
Take some time to check whether you're taking on the full load. If you think you might be, ask yourself how that came to be. Think about the personal consequences for you. Is it worth the price? Can you ask for help? Top Next Issue
The article you've been reading is an archived issue of Point Lookout, my weekly newsletter. I've been publishing it since January, 2001, free to all subscribers, over the Web, and via RSS. You can help keep it free by donating either as an individual or as an organization. You'll receive in return my sincere thanks — and the comfort of knowing that you've helped to propagate insights and perspectives that can help make our workplaces a little more human-friendly. More
Your comments are welcomeWould you like to see your comments posted here? rbrenrDUDwWaUxOAJtKFRner@ChaclWPJpPZohNvtYLEJoCanyon.comSend me your comments by email, or by Web form.
About Point Lookout
Thank you for reading this article. I hope you enjoyed it and found it useful, and that you'll consider recommending it to a friend.
Support Point Lookout by joining the Friends of Point Lookout, as an individual or as an organization.
Do you face a complex interpersonal situation? Send it in, anonymously if you like, and I'll give you my two cents.
More articles on Emotions at Work:
- The Unappreciative Boss
- Do you work for a boss who doesn't appreciate you? Do you feel ignored or excessively criticized? If
you do, life can be a misery, if you make it so. Or you can work around it. It's up to you to choose.
- What We Don't Know About Each Other
- We know a lot about our co-workers, but we don't know everything. And since we don't know what we don't
know, we sometimes forget that we don't know it. And then the trouble begins.
- Quips That Work at Work: I
- Perhaps you've heard that humor can defuse tense situations. Often, a clever quip, deftly delivered,
does help. And sometimes, it's a total disaster. What accounts for the difference?
- On Differences and Disagreements
- When we disagree, it helps to remember that our differences often seem more marked than they really
are. Here are some hints for finding a path back to agreement.
- How to Listen to Someone Who's Dead Wrong
- Sometimes we must listen attentively to someone with whom we strongly disagree. The urge to interrupt
can be overpowering. How can we maintain enough self-control to really listen?
See also Emotions at Work for more related articles.
Forthcoming issues of Point Lookout
- Coming December 11: The Rhyme-as-Reason Effect
- When we speak or write, the phrases we use have both form and meaning. Although we usually think of form and meaning as distinct, we tend to assess as more meaningful and valid those phrases that are more beautifully formed. The rhyme-as-reason effect causes us to confuse the validity of a phrase with its aesthetics. Available here and by RSS on December 11.
- And on December 18: The Trap of Beautiful Language
- As we assess the validity of others' statements, we risk making a characteristically human error — we confuse the beauty of their language with the reliability of its meaning. We're easily thrown off by alliteration, anaphora, epistrophe, and chiasmus. Available here and by RSS on December 18.
I offer email and telephone coaching at both corporate and individual rates. Contact Rick for details at rbrenrDUDwWaUxOAJtKFRner@ChaclWPJpPZohNvtYLEJoCanyon.com or (650) 787-6475, or toll-free in the continental US at (866) 378-5470.
Get the ebook!
Past issues of Point Lookout are available in six ebooks:
- Get 2001-2 in Geese Don't Land on Twigs (PDF, )
- Get 2003-4 in Why Dogs Wag (PDF, )
- Get 2005-6 in Loopy Things We Do (PDF, )
- Get 2007-8 in Things We Believe That Maybe Aren't So True (PDF, )
- Get 2009-10 in The Questions Not Asked (PDF, )
- Get all of the first twelve years (2001-2012) in The Collected Issues of Point Lookout (PDF, )
Are you a writer, editor or publisher on deadline? Are you looking for an article that will get people talking and get compliments flying your way? You can have 500 words in your inbox in one hour. License any article from this Web site. More info
- The Power Affect: How We Express Our Personal Power
Many people who possess real organizational power have a characteristic demeanor. It's the way they project their presence. I call this the power affect. Some people — call them power pretenders — adopt the power affect well before they attain significant organizational power. Unfortunately for their colleagues, and for their organizations, power pretenders can attain organizational power out of proportion to their merit or abilities. Understanding the power affect is therefore important for anyone who aims to attain power, or anyone who works with power pretenders. Read more about this program.
- Your stuff is brilliant! Thank you!
- You and Scott Adams both secretly work here, right?
- I really enjoy my weekly newsletters. I appreciate the quick read.
- A sort of Dr. Phil for Management!
- …extremely accurate, inspiring and applicable to day-to-day … invaluable.