Off-the-charts arrogance is arrogance so far beyond garden-variety arrogance that most people don't recognize it as arrogance. They simply can't believe that anyone could say such things and truly believe them unless what they said was actually true. The extremism of off-the-charts arrogance is therefore what prevents us from identifying it as arrogance. And that's why off-the-charts arrogance is perhaps the most dangerous of all the narcissistic behaviors I've been exploring over these past three months.
As a reminder, the behaviors and attitudes typically regarded as narcissistic are these:
- Expresses exaggerated self-importance
- Preoccupied with superiority fantasies
- Believes that he or she is special and that only special people or institutions can fully appreciate that specialness
- Constantly demands attention and admiration from others
- Expects and demands favorable treatment
- Exploits others for personal ends
- Ruthless disregard for the feelings of others
- Envies others or believes that others envy him or her
- Is off-the-charts arrogant
Let's now have a closer look at the ninth item above: off-the-charts arrogance. For convenience in this series, I've been referring to the person exhibiting narcissistic behaviors and attitudes as either Nick or Nora. This time, it's Nora.
- When Nora enters a room, she expects to be acknowledged, not by a simple "Hey," or "Hi Nora," but by everyone present turning their attention to her. Even better, anyone who's seated should rise to greet her. Her contributions to conversations are invariably about herself, and they're always positive. Many of her self-aggrandizing comments serve double duty by simultaneously insulting others, or by advancing her own agenda at the expense of others' agendas. She accomplishes these feats by relying on a fairly impressive ability to charm people.
- Perhaps the most revealing Of all narcissistic behaviors,
off-the-charts arrogance is
perhaps the most dangerous
to the organizationillustrations of Nora's off-the-charts arrogance are her responses when people point out inaccuracies or inconsistencies in her assertions. She usually finds a way to deny having made the disputed assertion, or she refutes the claim as inaccurate, or derails the exchange by raising unrelated issues, all while attacking the personhood of the claimant. She targets for ultimate destruction any repeat "offenders."
- Assertions about her own capabilities might be mere expressions of confidence if Nora's focus were comparing her capabilities to what might be needed to actually accomplish the task before her. But her focus isn't the task; her focus is asserting that her capabilities are superior to others' capabilities. (See "Is It Arrogance or Confidence?," Point Lookout for March 14, 2018, for more) Those who exhibit run-of-the-mill arrogance are annoying individuals. But Nora's off-the-charts arrogance makes impossible the task of determining whether or not she actually believes she can achieve the objectives to which she has committed herself and others. She effectively ignores the tasks before her until disaster looms, at which point she casts about for an escape or for someone weak enough to serve as a scapegoat. Acknowledging her own errors or deficits is beyond her capability, which shortcoming can lead ultimately to her own undoing.
- Organizational risks
- Most narcissistic behaviors provide fuel for toxic conflict. Arrogance is very effective as such fuel, and it presents significant organizational risk. But Nora's off-the-charts arrogance, combined with her charm, can lull the people of the organization into believing that she can accomplish impossible feats. Or it can lead the organization's people to commit to objectives that are actually beyond their reach, and which might be beyond anyone's reach. These delusions expose the organization to the risk of committing itself to impossible budgets and schedules, or worse, to goals unattainable with any budget or within any schedule.
- Coping tactics
- As Nora's supervisor, coping tactics for the toxic conflict generated by her arrogance are similar to those suggested in previous installments of this series. See "Narcissistic Behavior at Work: VIII," Point Lookout for May 16, 2018, for an example. More important is the risk that Nora has persuaded the organization to commit to unattainable objectives. Carefully review any initiative Nora has energetically advocated, even if she's no longer involved — actually, especially if she's no longer involved. To determine feasibility, seek the advice of dispassionate experts.
- As Nora's co-worker, be aware that expressing skepticism about Nora's capabilities will probably make you a target of hers. To protect her view of herself, she'll do what she can to reduce your influence, permanently if possible. Expressing doubt about her capabilities is therefore a risk to your career. Do so only if you've prepared defenses, including interventions by very powerful players in your organization.
This issue brings to a close my series on narcissistic behaviors. These nine behaviors interact and reinforce each other in ways that might not be evident at first read. Even if you've been reading the pieces in this series issue-by-issue as they became available, reading them again can provide fresh insight. First in this series Top Next Issue
Is every other day a tense, anxious, angry misery as you watch people around you, who couldn't even think their way through a game of Jacks, win at workplace politics and steal the credit and glory for just about everyone's best work including yours? Read 303 Secrets of Workplace Politics, filled with tips and techniques for succeeding in workplace politics. More info
Your comments are welcomeWould you like to see your comments posted here? rbrenakWNySjyiXQTgjtQner@ChacuCwluNzoDXHmGGzRoCanyon.comSend me your comments by email, or by Web form.
About Point Lookout
Thank you for reading this article. I hope you enjoyed it and found it useful, and that you'll consider recommending it to a friend.
Support Point Lookout by joining the Friends of Point Lookout, as an individual or as an organization.
Do you face a complex interpersonal situation? Send it in, anonymously if you like, and I'll give you my two cents.
More articles on Workplace Politics:
- Patterns of Everyday Conversation
- Many conversations follow identifiable patterns. Recognizing those patterns, and preparing yourself
to deal with them, can keep you out of trouble and make you more effective and influential.
- Unwelcome Workplace Hugs
- Some of us are uncomfortable about workplace hugs, and some want to be selective. Sometimes hugs are
simply inappropriate. Here are some tips for dealing with unwelcome workplace hugs.
- Political Framing: Strategies
- In organizational politics, one class of toxic tactics is framing — accusing a group or individual
by offering interpretations of their actions to knowingly and falsely make them seem responsible for
reprehensible or negligent acts. Here are some strategies framers use.
- Before You Blow the Whistle: II
- When organizations become aware of negligence, miscalculations, failures, wrongdoing, or legal infractions,
they often try to conceal the bad news. People who disagree with the concealment activity sometimes
decide to reveal what the organization is trying to hide. Here's Part II of our catalog of methods used
to suppress the truth.
- Exploiting Functional Fixedness: I
- Functional fixedness is a cognitive bias that creates difficulty in seeing novel uses of things that
have familiar uses. Some devious moves in workplace politics exploit functional fixedness.
Forthcoming issues of Point Lookout
- Coming March 27: Stone-Throwers at Meetings: II
- A stone-thrower in a meeting is someone who is determined to halt forward progress. Motives vary, from embarrassing the chair to holding the meeting hostage in exchange for advancing an agenda. What can chairs do about stone-throwers? Available here and by RSS on March 27.
- And on April 3: Career Opportunity or Career Trap: I
- When we're presented with an opportunity that seems too good to be true, as the saying goes, it probably is. Although it's easy to decline free vacations, declining career opportunities is another matter. Here's a look at indicators that a career opportunity might be a career trap. Available here and by RSS on April 3.
I offer email and telephone coaching at both corporate and individual rates. Contact Rick for details at rbrenplqQzBwjvyVxUNGSner@ChacfNOhIuvYSXzEowGDoCanyon.com or (650) 787-6475, or toll-free in the continental US at (866) 378-5470.
Get the ebook!
Past issues of Point Lookout are available in six ebooks:
- Get 2001-2 in Geese Don't Land on Twigs (PDF, USD 11.95)
- Get 2003-4 in Why Dogs Wag (PDF, USD 11.95)
- Get 2005-6 in Loopy Things We Do (PDF, USD 11.95)
- Get 2007-8 in Things We Believe That Maybe Aren't So True (PDF, USD 11.95)
- Get 2009-10 in The Questions Not Asked (PDF, USD 11.95)
- Get all of the first twelve years (2001-2012) in The Collected Issues of Point Lookout (PDF, USD 28.99)
Are you a writer, editor or publisher on deadline? Are you looking for an article that will get people talking and get compliments flying your way? You can have 500 words in your inbox in one hour. License any article from this Web site. More info
- The Power Affect: How We Express Our Personal Power
- Many people who possess real organizational power have a characteristic demeanor. It's the way they project their presence. I call this the power affect. Some people — call them power pretenders — adopt the power affect well before they attain significant organizational power. Unfortunately for their colleagues, and for their organizations, power pretenders can attain organizational power out of proportion to their merit or abilities. Understanding the power affect is therefore important for anyone who aims to attain power, or anyone who works with power pretenders. Read more about this program.