Your Wishing Wand

Standing at Jordan's door, Stephanie couldn't stop smiling. That started Jordan smiling, too — he couldn't help it. "Come in, sit," he said to Stephanie. "Spill."

"I wished, and it happened," she began. "I must have magic powers."

"I don't know about that, but tell me what happened." Jordan hated being teased, even a little.

"OK. Day before yesterday, driving home, I'm imagining that Marigold could somehow be kept alive. I'm wishing for the chance to tell Emmons how to fight for it. I work out exactly what I would say. Then yesterday — it's freakish — I get that chance. And today I find out it worked."

"Amazing," said Jordan, "you saved Marigold. Congratulations!"

"Emmons saved Marigold," Stephanie said. "I just wished him the will."

You do have
a wishing wand,
though you might not
be using it often.
Seen it lately?Stephanie did more than wishing him the will. She showed him the way. She was ready for the opportunity because she had used her wishing wand. You have a wishing wand, too, though you might not be using it often. Maybe a little user's guide will help.

Wish for the possible

Your wishes are more likely to come true if you wish for the possible. A wish to fly like a bird is less likely to come true than a wish for an airline ticket to Tahiti.

Wish for the wonderful

Within the range of the possible, there's plenty of room for the wonderful. Take ten seconds — right now — to wish for something wonderful. See how easy it is?

Wish for good

Wishes for harm to come to anyone are poisonous. The feelings you create while contemplating these wishes are your feelings. They hurt only you.

Wish for yourself, for others, and for all

Wishes in fairy tales are often self-centered. Try wishing for others, and for all of us. Whenever a wish comes true, you feel the same thrill, no matter who benefits.

Not wishing doesn't help

Some of us fear the pain of disappointment when a wish doesn't come true, so we don't wish at all. What a loss! Dealing with disappointment is a critical skill. Wishing gives you opportunities to practice your skill.

If you know what you really, really want, you're a lot more likely to get it

Deciding what to wish for is what does the magic. Deciding helps you focus on some things, and let others go. This makes you more likely to make the little moves that make your dreams come true, and less likely to make the little moves that keep your wishes wishes.

Do you have a wishing wand? Have you ever had one? If you don't have one, make one. Keep it handy. Use it often. Wish for something for yourself, for someone else, and for us all.  Top    Next Issue

Love the work but not the job? Bad boss, long commute, troubling ethical questions, hateful colleague? This ebook looks at what we can do to get more out of life at work. It helps you get moving again! Read Go For It! Sometimes It's Easier If You Run, filled with tips and techniques for putting zing into your work life. Order Now!

For more on achieving and inspiring goals, see "Corrales Mentales," Point Lookout for July 4, 2001; "Commitment Makes It Easier," Point Lookout for October 16, 2002; "Beyond WIIFM," Point Lookout for August 13, 2003; "Give It Your All," Point Lookout for May 19, 2004; "Knowing Where You're Going," Point Lookout for April 20, 2005; "Workplace Myths: Motivating People," Point Lookout for July 19, 2006; "Astonishing Successes," Point Lookout for January 31, 2007; and "Achieving Goals: Inspiring Passion and Action," Point Lookout for February 14, 2007.

Your comments are welcome

About Point Lookout

Thank you for reading this article. I hope you enjoyed it and found it useful, and that you'll consider recommending it to a friend.

This article in its entirety was written by a human being. No machine intelligence was involved in any way.

Point Lookout is a free weekly email newsletter. Browse the archive of past issues. Subscribe for free.

Support Point Lookout by joining the Friends of Point Lookout, as an individual or as an organization.

Do you face a complex interpersonal situation? Send it in, anonymously if you like, and I'll give you my two cents.

Related articles

More articles on Emotions at Work:

Intimidation Tactics: Touching

Workplace touching can be friendly, or it can be dangerous and intimidating. When touching is used to intimidate, it often works, because intimidators know how to select their targets. If you're targeted, what can you do?

Believe It or Else

When we use threats and intimidation to win debates or agreement, we lay a flimsy foundation for future action. Using fear may win the point, but little more.

How to Avoid a Layoff: Your Relationships

In troubled economic times, layoffs loom almost everywhere. Here are some tips for reconfiguring your relationships with others at work and at home to reduce the chances that you will be laid off.

Ego Depletion: An Introduction

Ego depletion is a recently discovered phenomenon that limits our ability to regulate our own behavior. It explains such seemingly unrelated phenomena as marketing campaign effectiveness, toxic conflict contagion, and difficulty losing weight.

Contribution Misattribution

In teams, acknowledging people for their contributions is essential for encouraging high performance. Failing to do so can be expensive. Three patterns of contribution misattribution are especially costly: theft, rejection/transmigration, and eliding.

See also Emotions at Work for more related articles.

Forthcoming issues of Point Lookout

Coming May 1: Antipatterns for Time-Constrained Communication: 2

Recognizing just a few patterns that can lead to miscommunication can reduce the incidence of miscommunications. Here's Part 2 of a collection of antipatterns that arise in communication under time pressure, emphasizing those that depend on content. Available here and by RSS on May 1.

And on May 8: Antipatterns for Time-Constrained Communication: 3

Recognizing just a few patterns that can lead to miscommunication can reduce the incidence of problems. Here is Part 3 of a collection of antipatterns that arise in technical communication under time pressure, emphasizing past experiences of participants. Available here and by RSS on May 8.

Coaching services

I offer email and telephone coaching at both corporate and individual rates. Contact Rick for details at rbrendPtoGuFOkTSMQOzxner@ChacEgGqaylUnkmwIkkwoCanyon.com or (650) 787-6475, or toll-free in the continental US at (866) 378-5470.

Get the ebook!

Past issues of Point Lookout are available in six ebooks:

• Get 2001-2 in Geese Don't Land on Twigs (PDF, )
• Get 2003-4 in Why Dogs Wag (PDF, )
• Get 2005-6 in Loopy Things We Do (PDF, )
• Get 2007-8 in Things We Believe That Maybe Aren't So True (PDF, )
• Get 2009-10 in The Questions Not Asked (PDF, )
• Get all of the first twelve years (2001-2012) in The Collected Issues of Point Lookout (PDF, )

Are you a writer, editor or publisher on deadline? Are you looking for an article that will get people talking and get compliments flying your way? You can have 500-1000 words in your inbox in one hour. License any article from this Web site. More info